definite article ‘blya.’

[kag0r]

Onagus Khayastanicus Caucasian Taxi Driver Distinguishing Features: Speaks with nearly unintelligible accent, and punctuates sentences with definite article ‘blya.’ Rasping cough from smoking 4 packs of Russkii Stil’ a day. Apparent death wish manifested in driving habits. Habitat: Behind the steering wheels of Moscow gypsy cabs. Squatting in a circle of other cab drivers outside of bars, restaurants and train stations. Danger if Provoked: High. Even though dimunitive in size, angering the species with talk of Caucuses politics may result in his already-reckless driving style becoming suicidal. Do not, under any circumstances, suggest an alternative route. Mortal Weaknesses: Poor knowledge of Moscow road system can result in agreeing to drive out to Mozhaisk for 150 rubles. Comments: This species densely populates urban Moscow. Despite poor familiarity with Moscow roads, he has encyclopedic knowledge of tochki, which he will happily share with you.